by Niall Doherty


I tend not to make a big deal about my birthday. In my experience, trying hard to make a day special is a sure-fire way to make it suck. Anti-climactic and all that. But today was nice. Walking around Amsterdam, showing off the city to my parents, seeing things I’d never seen before. It’s good they’re here or I would have treated this like any other work day.


We pass under a canal and find ourselves on a 27-kilometer stretch of dam that seals off the old entrance to the port of Mokum. There’s no toll. There is a bike lane, all the way along. We’re in a rented car, making this the fifth country I’ve driven in. Twas a bit nerve-wracking this morning getting out of the city. Been a year since I got behind the wheel.


Sometimes I wonder if I’m cut out for family life. The wife and kids thing, I mean. Whenever I spend a full day around other people I start craving solitude, eager to sneak back to my little sanctuary and do my own thing, have some downtime, not speak to anyone. I was positively giddy today returning to the apartment.


Practicing tension. Habitual people-pleaser that I am, I tend to break it pretty fast. Been reading how important it is to maintain for flirting and seduction. So… out tonight, practicing, approaching, more eyes, less words. The cute blonde comes to find me later and asks if I’m going to take her number. Huh. Might be something to this.


A friend asked what my goal is when out meeting women. “Are you looking for validation, a girlfriend, or sex?” I’m not looking for a girlfriend, sex is great but I often prefer going home alone… so yeah, that leaves validation. Not saying I’m proud of it, but that’s most often what I’m seeking.

Loadsa windmills at Zaanse Schans

Loadsa windmills at Zaanse Schans


Energy has been low the last couple of weeks. Not sure if you get this too, but when I’m tired, the urge to consume grows stronger. Sleep would help most, but instead I’m compelled to stay up late watching Netflix and eating food I’m not hungry for. Trying hard to keep the binging at bay this eve. Sitting with the weariness, getting to know one another.


I had no freelance leads a month ago, having dropped all my clients late last year so I could focus on building 3M1K. Getting back in the swing of it now. Today I had a fresh inquiry in my inbox, two calls with prospective clients for projects worth $2,300, another message on Upwork regarding a $1k gig, and spent an hour working on an $800 project I landed last week.


Decided to quit salsa and skipped class tonight, doubt I’ll even finish out the month. Dancing two evenings a week isn’t enough to get good, and if I’m not getting good I’m getting frustrated. I could invest more of course, but I’m running low on downtime as is, gotta reserve most of my energy for work stuff. Keeping that sacred.


You’re in Amsterdam and have to get to the far side of the city in a hurry. You look up the route on Google Maps:

  • 19 minutes by tram
  • 15 minutes by car
  • 13 minutes by bike

Gotta love his town.


Thinking back to last Saturday. The cute blonde. It occurs to me now that she wanted me to push it further, was likely disappointed that I didn’t. Asked her out for a drink this week but blown off. Good chance I’ll never seen her again, moment passed. Gotta stop assuming I know where the line is, keep pushing til I hit it.

Coffee at Central Station.

Coffee at Central Station.


If the same bad thing keeps happening to you over and over again, stop complaining and make a plan of action. Practice the exact words you’ll use next time you’re in a conversation you want out of. Mentally rehearse the exact actions you’ll take next time you sense a situation going awry. If x, then y. You’re the puppet and the puppeteer.


Built a lot of social momentum the past two days. Tempted to head out again tonight and keep it rolling. Tomorrow’s a bank holiday, everyone else is off, I deserve a break too, right? But, no, that’s dangerous thinking right there. Priorities. Focus. I’ve had enough fun for one weekend. Time to get back to work…

…and then the phone rings.


Reflecting on an interaction I had on Saturday with a Norwegian guy. I made a joke that he took offense to. “No fucking way,” he barked. “Take that back!” I kept quiet and gave him a look, half confused, half amused, as if to say, “Seriously?” For a moment it was a stand-off, and then I guess the tension got the best of him and he talked on like nothing had happened.


Came across this graphic on Facebook. That’s exactly how it’s been for me the past couple of months. But today was undoubtedly of the hell-yeah variety. Got back in from a meetup to find a fresh sale of 3M1K, a $72 affiliate commission, plus a message from a prospective client who’d like to chat more about a $6k pitch I submitted earlier.


Wednesdays be Skype days, batching my calls together. Had ten scheduled today, one cancelled, so I did nine. A couple of friends, some members of 3M1K, and some other folks curious about 3M1K. I don’t hard sell to that last group, but perhaps I should. I get the impression that some of them need that, too indecisive on their own.


Sorry to hark on about the 3M1K stuff, but hey, that’s my main thing right now. Put together my first case study today. One member started doing freelance editing and proofreading at the start of March and earned €1,226 for the month. She shared screenshots of her pitches and everything. You can see the case study here.

Grand stretch in the evenings now, hah?

Grand stretch in the evenings now, hah?

In the comments below, let me know which of the above Momentos is your favorite. Which can you relate to?

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